Disney X Rated ;)

So, waking up at noon on a Sunday is typically what happens in this household. Well for me at least. The first thing i usually do is eat some breakie, then go straight to the computer. My Windows Live Messanger usually always pops up and that "Today" window comes up too. I like to hear all these random tabloid stories that make no sense. But there was this one article that really got me going, it was titled "Disney's XXX secrets". I've only thought Walt Disney was a bit of a pedo or some sort of horny psycho, and this article just made me laugh.

Alright, so the first picture they have in the gallery was a scene from Aladdin. And they claim that as Aladdin tries to sneak into the Princess's balcony, he says to the tiger Raja "Good teenagers, take off your clothes". I find that confusing, i dont understand why on earth he would be saying that to Raja, and why Aladdin is saying that using plural form "teenagers". Is there something else in this scene we dont see? What was really said was "Come on...good kitty, take off and go". Pretty much some horny adolescents misheard this and assumed the worse.

The next scandal, i know is diffently true. Does anyone remember in the Lion King, when Simba has grown up and slumps onto the edge of the cliff and beneath him a pile of dust flies into the night sky, and this strange, abnormal pattern appears? Well if you look closely and pause at the right moment, you can see the word SEX. Cool right? Most people who disagree with fact that it says SEX in the sky, claim it says SFX because they wish to keep the integrity of the film and all that Disney stands for, BULLSHIT!

One of my all time favourite Disney films was the Little Mermaid. There's many issues i find with the Little Mermaid, like for example, in the scene just after Ariel flees from the shore after saving Prince Eric and stares at him from afar on the rocks, does anyone notice how skinny Ariel is? I find that highly controversial, i mean is Disney trying to say that only skinny girls can land the guy? I have not seen a fat or above average sized woman in any Disney movie winning the Prince. Anyway thats not the controversy, the controversy here lies in the movie cover.

Now, i don't know if you can see that, or maybe I'm just a filthy adult, but to me, that figure within the castle looks a lot like a penis? Am i wrong? You can interpret that in any way you like, but i like my theory ;). The article then claims that the artist was completely unaware of the resemblance of the male genitalia, WHATEVER TREVOR!

Next theory was that the priest performing the wedding ceremony between Eric and Ursula in disguise was that the priest got a bit too "excited" if you know what i mean ;).

And yet again, they've managed to kill the fun out of this "exciting" scandal. Apparently as you see in the other picture, its just his knees. Boring huh? Controversy makes things a lot more interesting in my opinion.

I personally like this one, because apparently its actually true. Alright, the Rescurers, so far the oldest movie in the list so far. It says that when the two mice are flying around in their sardine tin airplane there is a woman who appears topless in the window as they pass by. And people claim us teenagers/adolescents are horny and disturbed from the things we do, pft!

The issue of nudity has no been addressed yet in Disney films, till now. In my personal opinion, i think Jessica Rabbit from Who Framed Rodger Rabbit is a whore to being with. Stuff all the controversy about the film, the fact that she is in the film foxy red hair and amazing body figure raises the issue. She is absolutely the biggest whore in Disney so far. Anyway the issue here is that, when she gets thrown out of her car apparently her vag is shown because she aint wearing any underwear. Well, i havent really seen Rodger Rabbit in a long time, and its not like i look into that stuff, but this i feel isn't worth seeing. You must be desperate to freeze frame that scene over and over again just to see if it actually happens.

Racism is a controversial issue in itself. In the words of Kirk Lazarus in Tropic Thunder "For four hundred years, the word has kept us down". If you havent watched Tropic Thunder yet, its the word Nigga. Apparently in a scene of Rodger Rabbit, Donald Duck is performing a duet with Daffy Duck on a black piano and Daffy is on the white piano, for obvious reasons there. But thats not the point, obviously the whole point of having them on coloured pianos is the crack up and i think it was misintended to offend anyone, but Donald supposedly calls Daffy a "nigga". Even though Disney was a psychotic nympho, i doubt he would add racist to his list of flaws.

The next one is from Pixar's Toy Story. Although its Pixar, not Disney this one is worth picking up. So apparently Mr. Potato Head tells Woody he is "Laser Envy" when Andy introduces Buzz to the rest of the toy crew. The "laser envy" theory dates back to Siegfried Freud's (i dont even know who it is, but i thought it was very clever) "Penis envy". You get the jist of it all, makes sense now huh?

I like Alice in Wonderland. I'm especially looking forward to the Tim Burton version with Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter. So they say that this movie is circulated around the aspect of drugs, that "going down the rabbit hole" is drug slang for let's take drugs and that retarded caterpillar is smoking something strange. What do you think? I mean, Alice does eat that mushroom and gets those weird illusions. I think the drugs aspect of it all was completely intentional. The whole point of Alice in Wonderland is that its a dream (well pretty much). Like an "imaginative journey" =P. The drugs aspect of it all just makes it sound more reasonable.

I never really liked Snow White. She isn't exactly the epitome of a Princess, and her Prince isn't exactly worth being called a Prince. What did he do to save her? Eric fought off a giant squid, Aladdin battled a massive snake and saved Jasmine from drowning in an hour glass. All Snow White's prince had to do was kiss her to wake up, LAME! Anyway, controversy here, the seven dwarves resemble the seven stages of cocaine addiction. If there were to be true, what would Doc mean? Well thank goodness, it isn't true, just someone trying to make everything dirty or controversial.

So thats my post for today =). Ciao

XOXO